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ORAM – THE BFG TURNS INTO GOLIATH


Jacob Oram, New Zealand’s answer to the big friendly giant, has cast aside his friendly demeanor and gone all nasty against South Africa, helping the Black Caps record a stunning quarter final victory. South Africa went into the match roaring favourites with a batting line up as long as the great wall of China and bowling resources as long as Oram’s inner thigh. But depth counts for little in tournament play, as any All Black fan will tell you, and this was the case as the Black Caps outplayed the fancied Proteas in all aspects of the game.

Superb batting from Ryder and Taylor steady the Black caps ship after a difficult start. This proved to be the foundation for the lower order as Williamson and co gave New Zealand glimmer of hope with a total of 221. In the bowling department it was Oram to the fore as he sneered four wickets and a superb running boundary catch to almost single handedly beat the South Africans.

Oram has been affectionately known as the BFG in cricketing circles due to his recent inability to dictate terms to the opposition. He is a monster of a man, who posses all the tricks in the bag but he has constantly been sidelined by injury and misfortune. However, since returning from injury his form has returned has shown that he wants to get rid of the friendly BFG facade. Thankfully for New Zealand the BFG is gone and we now have a Goliath in our ranks.
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KENYA LOOK ON BRIGHT SIDE – WE WON THE TOSS


Despite losing heavily to the rampant Black Caps earlier today the Kenyan cricket team is looking at the positives from their 10 wicket hammering.

Speaking to their coach, Eldine Baptiste, after the game he was surprisingly upbeat after the loss. Rather than focus on the fact his team can’t bat, bowl or field, he wanted to comment on what his team had done well. 

“Firstly, I was wrapped that we won the toss. That was just a brilliant start for us. The way that coin came down heads, just as our skipper predicted, was superb. This is an area of the game we have been working on and to hit it on the head in the first game was a real positive. My hope is that we can continue this form going into the next game but this time make the right decision when we win the toss and bowl. At least then we will still be technically in the game after 3 hours.”

In contrast to this, the Black Caps were slightly disappointed in their first up display and it is believed some selfish play by some of the senior members in the side may have caused a rift within the dressing room. With Tim Southee on a hat trick, Jacob Oram selfishly took the final wicket of the match to deny the ‘baby faced wonder boy’ a chance at a rare World Cup Hat-trick. Speaking after the game Tim Southee was distraught and attempted to square off with the 9ft tall giant. Fortunately Scott Styris wasn’t needed in the batting department, so acted like a movable GAZZA strip to keep the two bowlers apart.
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JACOB ORAM TO STAR IN NEW MOVIE


Jacob Oram is set to star in a new Hollywood movie later this year. The movie has been titled ‘Déjà vu’, but as yet the story line has been a closely guarded secret. However, insiders say the movie will be about the injury hit New Zealand cricket team. Oram fought off stiff competition for the main part from Shane Bond, Daniel Vettori and Black Cap newbee Hamish Bennett.

Jacob Oram hit with injury again.

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